Searching

I'm searching out my life. That's a weird statement to make but it's the honest truth. I think it's the best thing to do right now because of my missions trip coming up. Yes I'm totally excited about it but I understand the seriousness that comes with it, excitement can't overtake the importance of this summer.

The last blog I wrote I spoke about how impeccable God's timing was and is. Since that event happened I have been thinking a lot about God's timing in my life, not just His timing but His will. I've been digging deep into some harsh realities of my life. The fact that my service hasn't been all that great, I have been feeling an overwhelming pull to just serve. Serve unconditionally and happily. Also I have realized that missions is the right way to go, but I cannot even be in control of that. That is why I'm so stoked to go to Bosnia, I didn't choose it. I've been praying a lot about this because I'm very tired of living a life where I even want to be a little bit in control. This word CONTROL is such a huge factor in life that it completely constricts us. Control gives us fear and anxiety, I would rather give it to God.

I'm excited that missions is my life and that I feel that I have confirmation on that. This is one thing I'm sure of, and that is comforting. The Word must be my anchor, the will must be God's. I love God because He loved me first. My hope is that God will use me only for His will. I am excited to become the missionary that God will form me to be.

Peace.

Not our timing

The news and upset of the past week has been the earthquake that hit Haiti. As soon as we hear the number "200,000 presumed dead" we jump start into action. Also as soon as we hear the amount of people hit by it's destruction we begin praying and we still move quickly to find a solution. But some things come about before there is even a hint of destruction...a simple plan to do good in the world.

Here at MACU we had planned food packaging for Haiti well in advance of this earthquake, just to help the hungry people of the nation. Then a week before this event happened we heard the devastating news that our brothers and sisters had been hit severely with this disaster. This changed our perspective on the whole packaging food for the hungry, this meant that in God's time we were unknowingly about to help in a huge way, that we never thought in the weeks prior. This was a big lesson to me because it showed me the perfection of God's timing, and not our own.

So many times I get caught up in my plan that I forget about God's, but the event that we put on in the perfect timing of the disaster brought me to a whole new outlook on "my plan." Simply, it doesn't work anywhere near how it could if I would just let God take the reigns. Haiti needed us more than we ever knew, but God knew why they needed us much more severely than we thought. 61,000 meals for Haiti.....in 6 hours, this means that we were pumping out a little over 1,016 meals per hour. The whole time I was serving in that meal line I thought "why don't I do this everyday?" It feels so good to help others even those who you may never know until the Lord returns.

A life in God's time is well spent, and I strive to let the Lord do what he must in my life in His time.

Peace.

Excitement and fear

So today started two of my three missions classes. I love missions classes, obviously because I want to be a missionary, but especially now, especially since I'm getting closer to their reality. Soon they won't just be classes they will be my life. Ever wish someone gave you the handbook to this life? Well this is how I view these classes, pieces of the handbook for the rest of my life, although they don't hold all the answers, they are wonderful tools for the future.

In Missionary Life and Work, we answered questions about being a missionary. These questions made me think about this summer. Going to Bosnia this summer raises a lot of fears, excitement, and uncertainty, but excitement is the most prevalent among them all. My fears are finances, and how effective I will be when I get there. My excitements are the things I will learn there, How much it will strengthen my relationship with God, and more than anything the people who will come to know Christ. Also, beginning to love these people with a new love as a brother or sister in Christ. I guess uncertainties fall in the category between fear and excitement.

So although I am afraid of my deadlines and the fact that it is a lot of money, I know God has already paved the way for me. I am glad I have the excitement that I do, I think it trumps my fear. So here's to walking by faith, and not letting my silly eyes take a peek of the footsteps I take.

Peace.

Where You Meet Me

I've been thinking a lot about "meeting God." Although we as humans can't meet God face to face, we can meet God. God is omnipresent but there are times when we need to be met intimately by God and be fully ready to meet Him there also. To me it's a time where we completely surrender our entire selves to just be in His glory.

I mean think about it, we meet our friends and we are completely absorbed in the activities they want to do or the conversations you become a part of. Watching TV you sit quietly waiting for the next event to occur on your favorite show, completely enticed by the drama or the action. Why can't we be completely absorbed in our conversations with God or the activities He wants to do through us? Why can't we sit quietly on the edge of our seats waiting for the next big event that God has planned for us?

He meets us everywhere, He meets us in our success, our happiness, our boredom, our anxiousness, our breaking, our sadness, EVERYWHERE. A lot of the time we do not notice where he meets us because we are so aware of where the world meets us we sometimes don't notice that God is trying to meet us there. Some of the best moments of my life were when I met God where He wanted me to meet Him. But more often than not there are so many times where I don't realize that He wants me to meet Him.

I want to meet God where He wants me too, specially in ministry it is so important. So here's to meeting God...no matter where it may be.

Peace.