Are You Listening?

On the lookout for God's words. They come, softly, barely a whisper, at least it seems thats how he chooses to speak to me. It's rare that he screams out loud, when he does it's normally to keep my foot on the path. It's a strange and rather tedious way that I have to listen. I ask him to tell me what to do, what would be his wish for some certain decision or what have you, and he does. He tells me in the most subtle of ways, just like he is constantly asking:

Are you listening? 

I've been given the challenge this summer to find out what I want to do with my life in missions. Well I can't exactly answer that question yet, but I have this incredible urgency to find out. Who knows, it may be the dawn of graduation day before I figure it out, but the fact of the matter is I know I will find out. I am waiting and moving and doing as best I can looking for this subtle hint. I know some God ordained, revolutionary mission tactic will not jump into my brain, nor am I asking for it either. I am simply asking God, what do you want?

This seems like an absurd question. Of course God wants each and every person who believes in him to go and make disciples, give and give some more, be selfless, carry that cross like you're carrying your grandmother out of a burning building. Yes these are examples of what God wants us to do, but there comes a time in life where you have to ask this absurd question and it seems, at least for me, he keeps saying; are you listening?

I want to scream at the top of my lungs OF COURSE I'M LISTENING! But sometimes this would be a lie. Other things clutter my mind thus cluttering my ear space making it hard to concentrate on the one thing that would help me out most in life. Here I must interpose a colloquial saying, -well isn't that the devil-. It very well may be, however, we cannot blame the devil for everything, though I have no sympathy for him and he is the master of all evil, I cannot say that he clogs my ears all the time.  I am just as stubborn as the next imperfect person in need of a Savior.

But subtly just like noticing a budding flower on the side of the road, I hear him. It might take a couple of listens but in the end I get it all. I scrape the bowl as it were, and I know just what to do. I'm hoping this subtle, quiet, but ever faithful voice will be like a buzz in my ear. That absurd question won't be so absurd anymore and my life can continue being wrapped around the one who made my life possible.

My friends, as I listen for this still small voice, I am thanking you still in the loudest voice I know how to use. Thank you for the thoughts, prayers, and encouragement. Your prayers reach me everyday and I thank you so much and I will not stop. Again, please continue to pray for the people of this nation, they are in dire need of your prayers. Thank you.

All to God