My birthday

Today is my birthday and I keep thinking about the day I was born. Of course I don't remember it, but there are those who do. Like my Dad tells the story of when the doctor gave me to him and he went into the waiting room with me and my Grandma was appalled that he would bring out there and he asked her, "Well do you want to hold your new grand baby or do you want to complain about it?" I think about the stress I must have put on my mother's body since I was the naturally born child, no drugs, nothing, they even had to turn me around in the womb.

Though I understand that millions of children were born on February 11th in 1990, a part of me cannot give up the thinking about what God was thinking when I was born. What were his specific thoughts about me? I mean he foreknew that I would accept him, love him, and want to be in lifelong service to him. But when I was born into this world, in the flesh of this world, the sin of this world, what were his thoughts? He blessed me from the start, first surviving birth, and helping my mother survive my birth so that I would have her now on this birthday. I thank God I have my mom even now at year 21.

I often wonder if God is proud of the woman I've become thus far in life, despite my transgressions. I wonder how he will shape me when/if I reach 31, I wonder if he will be even prouder then. I hope so, I hope I (when I say I, I mean God through me) can make strides these next ten years for his Kingdom, so that when February 11, 2021 comes around I can look back and say life wasn't wasted, and look back still and say, love wasn't lost.

I praise God for bringing me this far in life.

All to God